How to confuse an idiot

63 trillion Florida voters can't be wrong...again

My family grows by one

Meet Cleo, my new roommate.

After nearly a year of dog-less existence I once again have a canine companion. Cleo is a 15 week old Cocker Spaniel. Her previous owners have been reassigned to Japan and Cleo can't go along. So she's decided to share my life and home.

She's a doll. She enjoyed the truck ride home, she couldn't be less interested in cats and gets along with other dogs. After a quick tour to become familiar with the layout of her new home, she's laid down next to my chair, completely relaxed. She seems to know when to be playful and when to relax. Monday we'll see how she does at work. She'll have a bed and kennel she can sleep in there, frequent walks and plenty of attention from the staff and customers.

My last Cocker couldn't make the trip back to San Diego with me due to not getting along well with Mariah, the alpha female that had been with me for years prior to the move. I found her a good home in Idaho, but regretted having to leave her behind. That was in 1995.

Thirteen years later there's once again a Cocker around the house. Of all the breeds I've owned, Cocker Spaniels have to be among the most mellow, the most naturally well behaved of any of them. They are trusting, loyal and easy going, good traits in dogs and humans alike.

We're going to relax for a little while then go for our first walk around the neighborhood. We'll see what she thinks about her surroundings.

Today is a good day.

Wal-Mart says, "Vote Republican or Else"

Wal-Mart Stores Inc. is mobilizing its store managers and department supervisors around the country to warn that if Democrats win power in November, they'll likely change federal law to make it easier for workers to unionize companies -- including Wal-Mart.

In recent weeks, thousands of Wal-Mart store managers and department heads have been summoned to mandatory meetings at which the retailer stresses the downside for workers if stores were to be unionized.

According to about a dozen Wal-Mart employees who attended such meetings in seven states, Wal-Mart executives claim that employees at unionized stores would have to pay hefty union dues while getting nothing in return, and may have to go on strike without compensation. Also, unionization could mean fewer jobs as labor costs rise.

The actions by Wal-Mart -- the nation's largest private employer -- reflect a growing concern among big business that a reinvigorated labor movement could reverse years of declining union membership. That could lead to higher payroll and health costs for companies already being hurt by rising fuel and commodities costs and the tough economic climate.

The Wal-Mart human-resources managers who run the meetings don't specifically tell attendees how to vote in November's election, but make it clear that voting for Democratic presidential hopeful Sen. Barack Obama would be tantamount to inviting unions in, according to Wal-Mart employees who attended gatherings in Maryland, Missouri and other states.

"The meeting leader said, 'I am not telling you how to vote, but if the Democrats win, this bill will pass and you won't have a vote on whether you want a union,'" said a Wal-Mart customer-service supervisor from Missouri. "I am not a stupid person. They were telling me how to vote," she said.  (Source-WSJ)

Spam, wonderful spam

Here are my favorite spam email subject lines for the last week.  Keep 'em coming, guys.  I can always use new material.

You've got male

The Loin King

The legend in bagger's pants

See the cockasian at work


Meanwhile, spam in a video...

Ping.fm's UI appears to me to be a sidebar in Facebook.

35 Rules for Good Writers

1. Verbs HAS to agree with their subjects.
2. Prepositions are not words to end sentences with.
3. And don't start a sentence with a conjunction.
4. It is wrong to ever split an infinitive.
5. Avoid cliches like the plague. (They're old hat.)
6. Also, always avoid annoying alliteration.
7. Be more or less specific.
8. Parenthetical remarks (however relevant) are (usually)
unnecessary.
9. Also too, never, ever use repetitive redundancies.
10. No sentence fragments.
11. Contractions aren't necessary and shouldn't be used unless you don't want to seem too formal.
12. Foreign words and phrases are not always apropos.
13. Do not use more words, phrases, sentences, or other linguistic elements than you, yourself, actually really and definitely need to use or employ when expressing yourself or otherwise giving voice to what you may or may not be thinking when you are trying to say how many words you should use or not use when using words.
14. One should NEVER generalize.
15. Comparisons are as bad as cliches.
16. Don't use no double negatives.
17. Eschew ampersands & abbreviations, i.e. etc.
18. One-word sentences? Eliminate.
19. Analogies in writing are like feathers on a snake.
20. The passive voice is to be ignored.
21. Eliminate commas, that are, not necessary. Parenthetical words however should be enclosed in commas.
22. Never use a big word when a diminutive one would suffice.
23. Kill excessive exclamation points!!!
24. Use words correctly, irregardless of how others elude to them.
25. Understatement is always the absolute best way to put forth earth shaking ideas.
26. Use the apostrophe in it's proper place and omit it when its not needed.
27. Eliminate distracting quotations. As Ralph Waldo Emerson is said to have once remarked, "I hate quotations. Tell me what you know."
28. If you've heard it once, you've heard it a thousand times: Resist hyperbole; not one writer in a million can use it correctly.
29. Puns are for children, not groan readers.
30. Go around the barn at high noon to avoid colloquialisms.
31. Even IF a mixed metaphor sings, it should be derailed.
32. Who needs rhetorical questions?
33. Exaggeration is a billion times worse than understatement.
And finally...
34. Proofread carefully to see if you any words out.

Teen Sells 17328 Boxes of Girl Scout Cookies

This item was stuck in between the OMG and WTF files:

Thin Mints, Samoas and Do-Si-Dos have helped a 15-year-old Girl Scout not only satisfy thousands of hungry tummies desiring the perfect sweet treat, but has also helped fund Jennifer Sharpe’s trip to Europe. The Michigan teen sold an amazing 17.328 boxes of Girl Scout cookies, a number that likely set a national record. Sharpe peddled her irresistible cookie collection on street corners and raised about $21,000, enough cookie dough (hee hee) to fund Troop 813’s 10-day trip to Europe.

Who needs a cat tree?

 
Cats never cease to amaze me. I have no idea how Lizbeth can get onto the second shelf above the toilet without causing anything on the rack above her to fall over. I envy her grace.

On the downside, I'm going to have to launder those towels again.

In the dark

A slice of (real) life

Question of the day

The compliment of suburban is urban.

Why isn't the compliment of a suburb an urb?

Code Monkey Dance

I ran across this video on The Uncredible Hallq's blog and enjoyed it so much I had to share. I cannot fathom why I like it, I just do. I think I'll do the Code Monkey dance at random moments at work tomorrow.

First impressions

Poking a little fun at some of my favorite tech bloggers. Click on the image to view.

S'truth

Trying too hard

Every President's Day local companies produce ads to entice buyers to purchase their products. Nothing unusual about that. What amazes me is the length some stores will go to in order to relate their product to the presidents. How do you sell furniture in relation to a federal holiday celebrating two U.S. presidents? You offer "presidential-sized savings". Are those Taft sized savings (he was so fat, weighing 330 pounds, that he got stuck in the White House bathtub) or are they only James Madison sized (5 feet 4 inches tall and weighed under 100 pounds)?

What the hell, presidential-sized saving? And we wonder at the illiteracy rates among our children.

Four faces of Samuel Barber

One of my favorite classical pieces is Samuel Barber's Adagio for Strings. It is in turn melancholic, inspirational, profound and restful. I've put together four videos featuring different musician's interpretation of this beautiful melody.


I can't honestly say I prefer one to the other. In their own way each version illustrates another facet of the work.


The first is the traditional, classical version. Second, a vocal version performed by The Choir of Trinity College,Cambridge,UK.Directed by Richard Marlow. Third, an electronic interpretation by William Orbit and finally, Dj Tiesto presents the Adagio in a techno style.


I hope you enjoy them as much as I do.

Jeber loves LOLcatz

You can now order a book of the original LOLcat cartoons from the original artist.

Limited edition signed drawing copy of Meet the Laugh-Out-Loud Cats, available from Hobotopia.

Kubuntu on an HP dv2000

I recently got an HP dv2410us and finally got tired of Vista, so I wiped the drive and installed Kubuntu 7.10. I was jazzed, all the major components worked immediately.

The only hardware that didn't work was the built-in webcam (no great loss), my bluetooth mouse (OK, I have a USB one as well) and the wireless (uh-oh).

It just so happened I was on my way to the KDE 4.0 release event at Google the next weekend, so I left it alone and waited to see if one of the great minds there could offer a suggestion.

To my surprise and pleasure, I had two great minds take a look at it. Jonathan Riddell (Jonathan is the only Canonical employee who works full-time with the Kubuntu project and is the lead maintainer and KDE developer) and a VP from AMD both examined my laptop and reached the disappointing conclusion that the Broadcom chipset in it is too new for Linux to have developed drivers for it.

So now I'm dual-booting Kubuntu with Vista and have the best of both worlds (well, on the Windows side that's open for debate).

My visit to Nirvana

 
I just got back from three days at the Google campus attending the release event for the Linux KDE version 4.0 desktop. The event itself was great. I got to meet quite a few very smart people from all over the world, united by our interest in Linux and the KDE desktop manager. But I don't think any of us could get over the fact that we were at Google, geek heaven, the holy of holies for the internet crowd.

We were "asked" not to say much about the Google campus, so I'm afraid I can't go into much detail about the place. We were not allowed to take pictures inside, only outside and only when accompanied by Google security or staff. Let's just say that having spent a few years working at the NSA I didn't feel that out-of-place at the Googlplex.